Wednesday, May 11, 2005

 

Consumers AREN'T morons (BETA)

Someone sent me a VERY rude e-mail about my comment that I didn't know consumers weren't morons. It almost made me choke on my yummy cheescake and I had to have a look at the definition of some of the words. Nice girls don't do that thing you suggested by the way.

Anway I'd just like to say that I didn't mean to upset people, it never even occured to us that people might think I meant anything nasty by it, and we discussed the whole thing in a huge big meeting about recommending things before I made that post.

Of course I don't think consumers are morons. I clearly meant to say that webmasters are morons.

Comments:
BTW, Marissa (now 28 years old)joined company X more than 5 years ago. She got 35,000 options when she joined, she excerised those options right away since they were very cheap, so she owns 35,000 shares.

Company X had two internal splits, so that makes 35,000 * 2 * 2 = 140,000 shares. Lets say she only got another 60,000 shares as annual review bonus as she got promoted from a peon to a Director (btw, rumor has it, she actually dated Larry Peta during this period).

Now company X stock is at about $230, so multiply $230 * 200,000 shares gives her $46M, but 20% of that will go to long-term capital gains, so really she just has $37M.

So please stop making fun of that poor little girl ;)
 
Marrisa

Can you tell me what is in your chalk , I noticed that when you speak with journalists and write on the chalkboard that they go into some sort of we love you stupor, we are guessing here thet it is "supercharged" by the cool ex grateful dead chef ;).

If you can't tell us the secret ingredients thats cool, we know its not evil, but we sure are curious :). Maybe you could send us some dust for Saturday nite or at least sell it at the google store, that would be sooo cool.
 
Dear Anonymous,

No I have nothing special in my chalk but I do have a very special way with people, I think it's undeniable I am very attractive and when I was very young Mommy taught me the way to distract people from what I was actually saying and to get them to focus on me.

At internal management meetings we have fun little tradition where we all enter the room to 'our songs' - my song used to be some thing I'd never heard of by Kate Bush, something about "I want to be a lawyer. I want to be a scholar", I never quite understood why to be honest. But now it's 'Milkshake' by Kellis and those words are deep if you really take the time to think about it.

Also, to Anonymous (so many people called anonymous, we must think abut helping people with a baby naming service.... [note to self; wonder if GooGoo.com is free] .... I don't have very much stock in Company X at all as I sold most of it on Mommys advice and invested in an underwear company shares.
 
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* Unreal, pretend, not true. Marissa, or indeed any Marissa, did not write this. This is a joke, a subtle dig at a company similar to CompanyX.